News Rodeo for June 5th: Speeches, Missing planes, and Being a “Starbucks Whore”.

Destorying small coffee shop businesses since the early 90s.

Destorying small coffee shop businesses since the early 90s.

Another News Rodeo, because this is fun for me.  Some people like to play sports. Some people watch horrible television shows like NCIS.  I do write ups.  I’m not only weird, but I probably have a slight mental condition.  Let’s get this party started!  First up, E3, E3, E3!  There is way too much news to cover, or even attempt to cover, all here.  But understand that the old E3 is back, leaving the odd, three year “experiment” behind.  Welcome back booth babes, obnoxious game demos and strange press conferences. And there are plans in the making for me to go next year. Oh Yes. I’m going next year. From Big Download:

Mark your calendars now because E3 2010 will be held June 15-17 and will again be held in the Los Angeles Convention Center. However many game publishers seem to be happy with how E3 2009 turned out. Electronic Arts’s CEO John Riccitiello is quoted as saying, “E3 2009 reflected the vitality, innovation and global presence of a rapidly growing industry. I’m already looking forward to next year’s event.”

Another big news event?  A plane is missing.  A huge airplane is just gone.  We thought we found it, but we didn’t.  We thought we found some wreckage, but it isn’t the wreckage we were looking for.

“It has been verified that the material did not belong to the plane,” Brig. Ramon Borges Cardoso told reporters in Recife, Brazil, about the material recovered Thursday. “It is a pallet of wood that is utilized for transport. It is used in planes, but on this flight to Paris, there was no wooden pallet.” He added that oil slicks seen on the ocean were not from the plane either and that the quantity of oil exceeded the amount the plane would have carried.

How can we lose an entire air plane? How can a huge airplane just disappear?  Hell, I lose my 3G connection when I move from the kitchen to the bathroom.  Technology won’t save us, no matter how much we beg it too.  One thing that might save us is complete and utter honesty, which is what President Barack Obama gave us during his wonderful speech in Cairo yesterday morning.  I almost missed the bus yesterday morning watching it.

This is important, not because it is a good speech and important subject matter.  It is important that our President is constantly DOING something, constantly trying to make the world better.

Dont hate the player...

"Don't hate the player..."

Not by shooting people, not by demands, not by invading countries, but by thoughtful and public foreign policy planning.  Our world will have no choice but to be better.  One thing that is making our world much, much worse is Morning Joe being sponsored by, wait for it, Starbucks.  God.

The conflict-of-interest argument resonated with several executives; one quipped that the deal was just a “continuation of the whoring” of a medium that long ago became beholden to the tangled interests of corporate parents. MSNBC president Phil Griffin called the title sponsorship deal “a natural fit” and “organic” for a show that invokes coffee in its title. Indeed, Morning Joe hosts Joe Scarborough and Mika Brzezinski were drinking Starbucks’ coffee beverages on the show well before the official branding kicked off June 1. The symbiotic relationship between the program and the coffee-maker was also on full display during the political conventions and the inauguration, when Morning Joe originated from Starbucks locations on the road.”

Yep, you saw it here first, folks.  From now on, prepare yourself for sponsorships up the butthole.  And, to kick things off, I’m anouncing my new partnership with, wait for it, AWESOME! That’s right! JarvisSlacks.com is sponsored by AWESOME, the only consumption that I consume when I’m consuming consumption.  I’m consuming right now.  Man, this is good!  Selling out is amazing! I should have done it years ago! So good!  Being a whore is the best thing ever.

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