A Single Man without Children writes about Birth Control

I don’t have children. I don’t have them because, I think, I don’t want them right now. I assume that, if I wanted kids, I would have had them by now. I make this assumption because I have everything I want now and I have everything I want because I made moves to get them.  I’m not saying I don’t want kids. I am saying that I don’t have them, for obvious reasons.

I put that qualifier in because I’m hesitate to write about birth control and it’s access.  I don’t have kids, so what gives me the right to showcase my opinion about their education and their upbringing?  It’s like the guy on the airplane annoyed at the screaming baby in the back.  Dude, it’s a baby. They cry and sleep and poop. That’s it.  How are you going to complain about that?


We live in a collective society and, even though I have no real right to do so, I think it’s important to talk about women, reproduction, birth control and the access to birth control because it does, very directly, affect me.  I live in the same society as people with children, so I think I should have the right to toss my two cents down.

Why don’t we give birth control out like candy?

One of the first things my mother did when I was a teen was tell me to get condoms.  If I didn’t get them, she would get them for me.  It was an interesting conversation when she had it with me because I didn’t even know how to talk to a woman, let alone have the ability to do so with any skill. I was also horrified that my mother had thought about me having sex enough to want me to buy condoms for the activity.  When I finally found some one to have sex with, I did have condoms, and I bought them PROUDLY. I was having sex! How many condoms could I buy? Was there a limit?  I had so many hormones raging through my body, I’m actually surprised I had the proper mental state to put money on the counter to purchase a condom, let alone remember to use one.

That’s the funny thing about education.  If you try and do it, it usually works.  My mother educated me (sort of) about safe sex.  Thus, I had safe sex.  What I don’t understand is why people are afraid to do this more, and why our government is worried about the ease of access.  Take the Obama Administration.  Last week, President Obama spoke to Planned Parenthood, the first time a President did it in history.  Great.  Hope and Change.  But, a week later, after a Federal Judge says that Plan B should be available to anyone, without any restrictions, the Obama Administration is moving to block it.  

The move came hours after the Food and Drug Administration approved over-the-counter sales of emergency contraceptives to women 15 and older. Previously, Plan B was available to teenagers younger than 17 only with a prescription. Older women had to request it from a pharmacist. The Obama administration also asked the U.S. District Court of the Eastern District of New York to stay Judge Edward Korman’s early-April ruling, which is set to take effect Sunday. The administration’s challenge will no doubt reignite a debate over whether young teens should be eligible to obtain emergency contraception without a doctor’s consent, a politically fraught issue that has vexed two presidential administrations and led to the resignation of multiple FDA officials.

Why not?  Why can’t a girl, 14 or 15, go into a drug store and get something that stops her from getting pregnant?

Bigger point: Why isn’t she on birth control in the first place?

Another bigger point: Why didn’t the boy in this situation use a condom?

A restatement of the bigger point: WHY ISN’T SHE ON BIRTH CONTROL IN THE FIRST PLACE?

Unplanned childbirth is one of the biggest problems facing our society.  When women have complete control of when they have a child, they can have more control over every other aspect of their lives. Having a child when you aren’t ready or capable to have one is such a weight on the shoulders of society that we don’t even think about it anymore.  Why is it so hard to understand this?

There are three counter-arguments.  I’ll take each one in turn.

Teenagers shouldn’t have sex anyway, because you should wait until you are married to have sex.  I don’t really see the point of me refuting this. I mean, who waits?  Also, baked into that statement is the assumption that married women will always want to have babies because, hey, married women are supposed to be baby factories.  I think it’s obvious how wrong that statement is, so let’s keep moving.

If a teen is too stupid to not have birth control, they should suffer the consequences.  This comes from the classic “Personal Responsibility Conservatism” mind state that says that you should make a smart decision every time and, if you don’t, then you deserve to deal with the ramifications.  This argument destroys itself because what if a young girl wants to be responsible and tries to get Plan B but can’t because the government says that she is supposed to be responsible? There’s also the idea that there are some decisions that are more right than others.  Not having sex is the right decision but getting Plan B is a bad decisions because, well, certain people say so.

Girls that young shouldn’t have access to Plan B because they are too young.  I understand that thinking of a 14 or 15 year old girl having sex is bothersome.  You know what’s also bothersome? Thinking of a 14 or 15 year old girl having a baby.

There is also the argument that Plan B kills a baby. I’m not sure how to attack that.  I’m not even sure that’s wrong. It’s also interesting that I’ve never had to think too deeply about any of that because I’ve never gotten anyone pregnant because my sexual partners have always used protection, just like me.  Is Plan B and Abortion pill?  Is Abortion moral wrong? Having an abortion should be a woman’s right to decide on.  We could eliminate that decision if we give a woman access to Plan B.  Or birth control. Or teach young men to wear a condom.  If we educate instead of restrict.  If the boy is wearing a condom, there isn’t a reason for the girl to get a Plan B pill.

Education, first and for most.  I’m not sure why that’s so hard for parents and politicians to understand.  Then again, I don’t have children.

3 thoughts on “A Single Man without Children writes about Birth Control

  1. good stuff, my only comment would be that just handing out any form of birth control without a prescription is a bad idea, not because i dont think it is a great idea to prevent all unwanted pregnancies but because birth control, and plan B, are hormones that do affect womens health in very different ways. You need a RX for birth control because there can be serious side effects that everyone should be aware of, especially a young girl and birth control is not something that all women can or should take. I also think it is really important for a dr to sit down and tell you 1) How they work 2) what to do in case you take them incorrectly and 3) how they might interact with other RX you might already be taking

  2. I think the issue with a prescription is the class barrier, the idea that many, many poor women and girls don’t have the money to see a doctor. If we had more free clinics and free doctors, this would be a none issue. But, the poor are already more likely to get pregnant, mainly due to education and because they lack the ability to get birth control. Take the South for example. Planned Parenthood isn’t nearly as well funded in North Carolina as it is in DC. I agree with you, but I think that the positives (Poor people not getting pregnant when they don’t want to) out-weighs the negatives. But I do agree that young women and girls should go to the doctor. Currently, there is no real push to make that possible.

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