News Rodeo: Tea Parties, Deep Blue Sea Snipers, and sending our crap to Cuba.

Never thought Id be on a boat...

Never thought I'd be on a boat...

News all over the place today.  Let’s start with Obama telling Marines to shoot dudes on a boat.  I’m on a boat/take a look at me/I got my head shot off in the deep-blue sea.

Three gunshots. All three fatal. Fired in the dark by three specially trained U.S. Navy SEALs as the pirates’ boat rocked in the water off Somalia.n”Phenomenal shots — 75 feet away,” said Navy Vice Adm. Bill Gortney, who oversees the region. A senior defense official said each was a shot to the head. Gortney, in an interview Monday with CNN’s “American Morning,” described critical steps that led to the rescue of U.S. Capt. Richard Phillips, who was taken by pirates after they boarded his merchant ship, the Maersk Alabama, east of Somalia on Wednesday. Four pirates had been holding Phillips in a small lifeboat, which had run out of fuel. Gortney told CNN’s Barbara Starr that the USS Bainbridge rammed the lifeboat Saturday to keep it from trying to return to the Somalian shore about 20 miles away.

I heard they drink out the same cup sometimes.

I heard they drink out the same cup sometimes.

My question?  What took so long?  I mean, how long does it take to decide that four guys from a lawless country with AK-47s are a threat to somebody?  The good news is that piracy is finally on the hot-key of the world.  In other news, have you heard about these Tea Parties?  If I’ve read all this crap right, there are going to be these “get togethers” by some Conservative dudes and they are going to “fill glass containers” full of “water” and “teabags” and then “brew” some “tea” and are going to “give it to people” because everyone is “broke.”  Maybe I read that wrong.  Can somebody help me with this?  Someone with some common sense?  Mr. Glenn Beck? Can you explain this to me?

If the Tea Parties were only about taxes, there would still be a great case for them. Americans pay more in taxes than on food, clothing and housing combined. But, they’re not. They’re about the reason for our taxes, which is an out-of-control government that can’t control its spending. Add up all the bailouts so far and Congress, the Treasury Department and the Fed have spent, lent and guaranteed a total of $12.8 trillion, an amount that’s practically equal to our country’s entire GDP. Need another reason to reexamine your “freedom”? Since the government can finance itself with debt, the Tax Foundation says that our unprecedented $1.5 trillion budget deficit means that the real Tax Freedom day won’t be until May 29 — 45 days from now.

This is a brand new car in Cuba. Theyll love my PSOne!

This is a brand new car in Cuba. They'll love my PSOne!

I guess he can’t.  We should have some “Jarvis Slacks” parties.  Only hot girls and video game players allowed, please.  And, lastly, who wants to go to Cuba!

President Barack Obama is allowing Americans to make unlimited transfers of money and visits to relatives in Cuba and easing other restrictions Monday, ushering in a new era of openness toward the island nation ruled by communists for 50 years. The formal announcement was made by presidential spokesman Robert Gibbs and, in Spanish, by Dan Restrepo, the president’s top aide on Latin American policy. “The president would like to see greater freedom for the Cuban people. There are actions that he can and has taken today to open up the flow of information to provide some important steps to help that,” Gibbs said.

Awesome!  Cuba is basically a Third-World Country! They have nothing and we need money! Box up all your crap and send it to Cuba so they can buy it for jacked up prices.  See!  Who said there aren’t any places left for us to exploit?  Next up, we are going to melt the ice-caps and bottle the water!  oh, wait…